


Say What You Need To Say

by Girl Wonder (sophialoving)



Series: The Spaces Between [2]
Category: Dungeons & Dragons (Roleplaying Game), Original Work, Skyfront
Genre: F/M, Game Changer, Honest Conversation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-25
Updated: 2018-02-25
Packaged: 2019-03-23 20:46:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13796025
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sophialoving/pseuds/Girl%20Wonder
Summary: After weeks of conflict and tension, Aya and Amthos finally have a completely honest conversation and it does not turn out the way either one of them expected.





	Say What You Need To Say

**Author's Note:**

> Amthos belongs to Andy, one of the players in our campaign.  
> This one is a piece we've written together in a text based roleplay thread that I've edited together into a coherent story.  
> The title is from the song by John Mayer.

She was fine. She had to be fine. She was mostly fine. Aside from not being able to properly say goodbye to her family, things had been going surprisingly well over the last week or so.

Being able to talk about the raised stakes on her personal Quest felt like such a huge weight lifted off her shoulders. It wasn't until she had a moment to truly think about some of the revelations that she realized just how dangerous the situation really was. A wave of anxiety hit her as she finished the last of the singular drink Camille allowed her to have before she found her spot next to Maverick after his return.

Opting out of using magic to communicate with Maverick, Aya simply whispered as she petted him, "You're such a good boy, Maverick. Such a good boy."

She had been doing a decent job distracting herself that she hadn’t noticed anyone approaching until a voice interrupted her thoughts.

“If it’s any consolation, I think you would have kicked that girl’s ass,” Amthos said as he approached and petted Maverick, stroking under his ear, “You’ll just have to settle for my psychotic friend. I know she’s close. I’m sure she’ll present herself soon.”

Hearing his voice cut through her thoughts, Aya thought back to the singular conversation they had on the airship about her struggle to trust to him and his desire to make it right...she wasn't sure initially if Amthos could ever completely make it right but destroying the contract was a step in the right direction, so she carried on the conversation to see what he wanted to talk about.

“That girl happens to be a living legend in Orna,” she explained, her eyes filled with admiration for the person had inspired her to become a skilled fighter in her own right, “I was there the first time she won the Carving Pit and she’d been kicking butt ever since.”

Aya looked up and watched Amthos interact with Maverick, and with a subtle signal from her, the wolf had presented himself to the Tiefling belly up for petting. The attack from the Phantom Archer had shaken her up, not having the chance to warn Amthos before she got taken down herself. As soon as Amthos stopped petting the wolf, he turned on his back for a belly scratch whilst giving the Tiefling puppy dog eyes, the simple gesture calming Amthos down to allow  him to collect his thoughts as he opted to sit to continue interacting with Maverick.

Noticing a bit of the tension he carried in his posture as he spoke about his psychotic friend, Aya's eyes turned serious once more. "I wasn't a hundred percent sure we were going to convince you not sign the contract," she admitted quietly.

“I’ll be honest, Aya, I wasn’t so sure myself,” Amthos confessed in turn, a smile escaping his lips,  “But who needs power when I’ve got you?”

Aya's heart skipped a beat when Amthos smiled at her. She blinked, feeling as though maybe her eyes were playing tricks on her, seeing as Amthos had not really smiled in all the time she knew him, at least not directly at her. But then it faded just as quickly and Amthos' words caught her attention again as she tried to refocus herself on the conversation.

Returning to his neutral yet somehow tense demeanor, he continued on speaking. “I don’t even know what I’m doing anymore. Before we all met, I had a purpose. It wasn’t all that noble or honorable but I had a reason, I was doing it for justice.”

"I'm sorry we ruined your plans," she chuckled nervously in response, "But on the bright side, I'm sure Fay would be into that justice thing if you told her about it. I mean, I'm glad you told me about your father, and I promise I didn't tell anyone, but maybe you shouldn't try taking things on alone anymore. You have me now. You have us. We can all help you if you let us..."

Amthos stood up again and placed his hand on her shoulder, startling her. “I’m sorry for what I put you through, what I put everyone through,” he told her, “Even Camille.  She is easy to wind up but she means well.”

The apology seemed sincere and this time, her anger wasn't clouding her judgement to the point of not being able to see it for what it was. "I know, and for what it's worth, I'm sorry too. I haven't been the easiest person to get along with lately."

“As for the Legend, I believe there could have been a new champion. You’re stronger than you think. Trust me, I've been on the receiving end."

When Sahara was mentioned, Aya chuckled at Amthos' comment. "There's always next year. Besides, some things are just more important than personal gain, the fame and glory wasn't as important as being there for my friends."  

There was a moment of silence but then, when their eyes locked, Amthos asked, “Aya, why don’t you trust me?”

In the conversation they had on the airship, Aya had mentioned the issues with Amthos' psychotic friend as the primary reason for all of the trust issues but had opted out of telling him about the rest of it.

"It's like I told you on the Dragonfly a few days ago, I was worried about some information getting into the wrong hands, and I'm pretty sure after our fight at the Tower, she counts as the wrong hands," she said quietly when her eyes locked with his, then she pointed out, "Up until today when you destroyed that contract, I wasn't really sure where we stood."

She hated the fact that it hurt her so much that he went through all the trouble of avoiding her question instead of talking to her. She could take physical pain but emotional vulnerability was never something she was good at handling, which led to some poor behaviour on her part towards Amthos.

It all seemed ridiculous in her mind so talking about her hurt feelings seemed like it was a terrible idea but there was a singular question that popped into her head that needed answering. "Why didn't you trust me enough to be honest with me the night I asked you about Hannah?" she asked as she broke eye contact to look down and pet Maverick again, "Why manipulate me instead of talking to me?"

Aya caught the flash of hurt in Amthos’ eyes as she spoke, which caused her to avert her gaze.

“Aya, I just wasn’t ready to tell you the truth,” he explained, “I didn’t mean to hurt you or manipulate you; I just panicked.”

“Just talk to me next time, just tell me,” Aya told him quietly. Despite wanting to cut the conversation short, she did not move, allowing his hand to stay on her shoulder.

Aya could feel the anxiety swell up in her chest. Still leaning towards him, she remained still as he explained his reasons for panicking, her eyes lowered to the ground, and to her surprise, they had nothing to do with secret feelings for Hannah.

“Let me try to explain this...have you ever lost someone?” he continued on, “I have, and I lost a piece of my soul that day and I learned to distance myself. I thought it was safer that way; you can’t lose what you don’t have. I thought it would be safer to keep you at a distance for my own sake. I can’t lose you guys.”

It wasn't until that moment that she dared to look at him to search his eyes for the sincerity she needed to find. When she found exactly what she was looking for, she added quietly, "Even if it's just one person, you need someone to support you. No person is an island, Amthos." ‘ _I could be that person,’_ the words remaining unsaid, they echoed in her mind.

Kneeling in front of her, Amthos locked his eyes with hers and told her, “You know I stand with you, Aya, and not that devil spawn.”

Aya forced herself to maintain eye contact this time. For a while, she lost sight of it with all of the hurt feelings, but deep down she knew where he stood. A part of her was just looking for an excuse to be angry at him, a reason to hate him. But with everything that's been said so far, there was no way she could hang on to the shield of anger.

Before she could react to his previous statement, Amthos cracked a smile. "Aya, why are you interested in what I have to say about Hannah?"

Aya found herself biting her lip, scrambling to find a response she was comfortable giving him.

"I was curious," she told him quietly, leaning over to whisper in his ear, "I mean, you said you needed her for information, right? That's totally acceptable. I just didn't understand why you panicked with me when I've been the only one who actually cared about you this whole time. I would have kept whatever secret you needed me to keep."  
  
One singular thought echoed in her mind as she spoke. _’Please don't make me say it.’_

She found herself being met with Amthos’ smile again as he spoke. “It’s nice to have someone who cares about me because let’s face it, I’m pretty reckless.” There was a pause before he continued. “Look, Aya, I panicked because up until now, we were at each other’s throats. I don’t know much about flirting, but I’m pretty sure we weren’t doing it. You caught me off-guard.”

"I'm sorry. This is all new to me, and sometimes I just get frustrated when I don't understand something. And for a long time, I didn't understand what I was feeling. I still don't completely understand what I'm feeling," the words escaped her lips before she could even think to stop them. With a sideways glance, she added, "I'm sorry I'd been so miserable and hard to get along with. Honestly, I was caught off-guard by all of this too."

When Amthos stood from his kneeling position, Aya thought at first that she had said something that possibly upset him, but when he turned back to squeeze her shoulders and speak again, she found herself exhaling sharply, letting out the breath she was holding as he spoke.

“Look, I can see it in your eyes that you care about me, right?”

"Yeah, I guess you could say I care. No matter how hard I tried not to care, no matter how much I spent trying to hide behind my anger, it didn't matter, I wasn't going to win the fight. I'd always end up caring too much. I guess now there's no point in fighting that."

“You know that while that psycho is around, it’s not safe for you to be close to me.” He looked away briefly and sighed. “She’ll just use you as a weapon against me until she gets what she wants or we end her.”

"And you're an idiot if you think I'm going to let you go through this alone. I could have the rest of the gang on top of a problem before you could even blink," she said with a slight chuckle, before she continued in a more serious tone, "And even if no one else was around, I still wouldn't let you go through this alone. You know just as well as I do that we're better together than we are apart. If I wanted a safe life, I would still be in Pryvale. But I'm here, having this conversation with you, because I was born to protect and defend. That's who I am. I won't let anything happen to you...or to anyone else in our group."

As Amthos leaned over to hug her, he whispered in her ear, “Aya, it’s all in the past now. Don’t dwell on the past or on what’s yet to be, let’s live in the moment.”

It was hard not to smile back at Amthos as his smile lit up his entire face. Aya could feel her anxiety melt away as she listened to him speak. For the longest time, she had been afraid of exposing her heart and the feelings themselves that she hid them away from the one person who needed to know about them. For the first time, she felt like a weight was lifted from her shoulders. All the talk about living in the moment and finding answers kept her from asking more questions. For the time being, she felt content with the way they had repaired their relationship, particularly after the way he leaned in to wrap his arms around her.

Amthos was the first to notice Camille and Hond return from the balcony and moved away from their intimately close position as though he had been caught doing something he shouldn’t have been doing, which puzzled at Aya at first until she also saw the pair from the balcony had returned.

“We should go see what everyone else is talking about,” Amthos suggested, “Hannah doesn’t look too happy about something.”

Aya nodded, standing from her position on the couch.

“I’m glad you have my back; just remember I have yours as well,” Amthos whispered as the two of them walked across the room to join the rest of their friends.

 


End file.
